My First Sermon

I delivered my first message on  Sunday, June 23. And though I veered away from the text that I had written (several times) and you are missing the incredible reenactment of the contest on Mt. Carmel between Elijah and the prophets of Baal... The following is at least representative of the message I delivered to a gracious audience. Since I was also running about 10 minutes long - even if you were there, you missed about a page of material near the end. Sorry everybody got out of church late! Hope you still made it to lunch before the restaurants all ran out of food!!

Shock And Awe 

(that was the sermon title in the bulletin, I ran through at least a dozen different titles during the writing of it)

A man appeared before St. Peter at the pearly gates. St. Peter asked the man if he had done anything of merit in his life. The man said that once when he was traveling in the Black Hills of South Dakota he found a group of bikers threatening a young woman. He told them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen. So he grabbed the biggest biker, punched him, kicked over his bike, ripped his nose ring out and threw it on the ground. Then he said, “back off or you'll answer to me!” St. Peter was impressed and asked the man when that had happened. The man said “about 5 minutes ago.”

That has to be a little like what Elijah felt – here he has this huge confrontation with 450 prophets of Baal...and he WINS...but now he is running for his life.

Ahab and Elijah have encountered each other before. They first meet when Elijah comes to tell Ahab that a drought is going to come over the land that will last for a long time. In the third year of the drought the Lord send him back to Ahab and Elijah tells him he needs to straighten up and decide whether he is going to worship the one true God or continue to worship false gods. Ahab is not a good king – in fact 1 Kings 16:33 says that he was a new champion of evil. He has made the God of Israel angrier than all the previous kings of Israel put together! And his wife, the Phoenician princess Jezebel doesn't help the situation. She actually supported the prophets of Baal from the royal treasury!

So when Ahab tells Jezebel what Elijah has done, she is shocked and greatly angered. Her response is: So may the gods do to me, and more also, if I do not make your life like the life of one of them by this time tomorrow : Jezebel heard about all that Elijah had done, encompassing the great confrontation at Mount Carmel. Yet her response was not to say, "The silence of Baal and the fire from Yahweh proves that I am wrong and Yahweh is God." Instead, she responded with a vow to kill within 24 hours the man who exposed the lie of Baal worship and displayed the glory of Yahweh.

If Elijah thought that the miracle at Mount Carmel would have been the beginning of the conversion of the whole court and of the country, he was mistaken. And now he is greatly discouraged.

Then he was afraid; he got up and fled for his life, and came to Beersheba. We cannot say for certain if this was led of God or not. It is clear that God wanted to protect Elijah, but we cannot say if God wanted to protect him at Jezreel or protect him by getting him out of Jezreel. Nevertheless, Elijah went about 80 miles south to Beersheba. Maybe Elijah played into Jezebel's hand. After all, had she really wanted Elijah dead, she surely would have seized him without warning and slain him. What she desired was that Elijah and his God be discredited before the new converts what had aided Elijah by executing the prophets of Baal.

Regardless, he does flee and after leaving his servant in Beersheba, he goes another day into the wilderness finally coming to rest under a solitary broom tree. Further into seclusion. There – this mighty prayer warrior of God, the one only recently prayed fire from the skies to prove the power of Yaweh...prays that he might die.

It is enough; now, O Lord, take away my life, for I am no better than my ancestors. Elijah is in a serious state of depression. He has had enough. He is saying “I can't do this any more Lord.” The work was stressful, exhausting, and it seemed to have accomplished nothing. The great miracle at Mount Carmel did not result in a lasting national revival or return to the Lord. Elijah probably hoped that the events on Mount Carmel would turn around Ahab and Jezebel and the leadership of Israel. But Elijah forgot that people reject God despite the evidence, not because of the evidence.

He says he is no better than his ancestors. When he looks at the apparent failure of his ministry he instinctively blames his own unworthiness.

I think we can all relate to Elijah's despair. At some point in our lives we've all gotten to the point where we say, “what's the point? I can't go on. I don't want to go on.” If you haven't, then praise the Lord! Because the rest of us have gotten to the end of our rope at some point in our lives. Maybe we were overwhelmed by a family issue or something at work or even felt burned out in our faith or church ministry. Perhaps you or someone you know has even lay under the broom tree and wanted to give up completely. Prayed for death.

God didn't grant Elijah's prayer for death. He gave him something else.

In the midst of this great despair, God sent an angel. Not with a pep talk...he took care of Elijah's physical needs first. Suddenly an angel touched him and said to him, “Get up and eat.” He looked, and there at his head was a cake baked on hot stones, and a jar of water. He ate and drank, and lay down again. The angel of the Lord came a second time, touched him, and said, “Get up and eat, otherwise the journey will be too much for you.”

God first ministered to Elijah's physical needs. This is not always His order, but physical needs are important. Sometimes the most spiritual thing a person can do is get enough rest and replenishment. And he received that repeatedly – one quick nap and one quick meal wasn't enough. Food and rest were the first elements needed to help this poor depressed servant of God.

It was very gracious of God to deal with Elijah in this way. Some of us might have expected a rebuke – but God didn't tell him to “walk it off” or “suck it up” - instead he allowed him respite, rest and renewal. Exactly what he needed before his long journey. And a long journey it was!

God sent Elijah on a 200 mile, 40 day trip to Mount Horeb, also known as Mount Sinai. God didn't demand an immediate recovery – he allowed his prophet time to recover from his spiritual depression. Although the trip could have been accomplished in about 2 weeks, Elijah spends 40 days traveling to Mount Horeb and upon arrival he spends the night in a cave. Literally, the Hebrew word is definite in describing “the cave.” The cave may well have been the specific “cleft of the rock” where God appeared to Moses rather than the cave-region in general. We do know that this was a sacred mount – perhaps no spot on Earth is more associated with the manifested presence of God.

Then the word of the Lord came to him, saying, “What are you doing here, Elijah?”  How often have we heard that? Sometimes when we think things are starting to smooth out – God says, “What are you doing here?” God knew the answer, but he allowed Elijah to speak freely and unburden his heart:

Elijah answered, “I have been very zealous for the Lord, the God of hosts; for the Israelites have forsaken your covenant, thrown down your altars, and killed your prophets with the sword. I alone am left, and they are seeking my life, to take it away. He sounds like the despair he felt back in the wilderness near Beersheba isn't completely healed! He protests to God, “I have faithfully served You and now look at the danger I'm in!” To Elijah – and many servants of God since – it seemed unfair that a faithful servant of God should be made to suffer. And strangely, the reasons that Elijah provided for wanting to give up, are actually the critical reasons he should stay alive! If he really was the last prophet or believer alive, should he not seek to live as long as possible? If the enemies of God like Jezebel wanted him dead, shouldn't he seek to defeat her wicked ways? But this is what fear and unbelief will cause in us!

Elijah was not really alone, but that is how he felt. Near the end of chapter 19 (verse 18), God states that there are seven thousand in Israel who have not bowed to Baal. But discouraging times make God's servants feel more isolated and alone than they are.

We all have times like these, don't we? Feeling like we're carrying the whole burden of a task alone? Why don't more people help out with teaching Sunday school? Where are all the volunteers for JIFF? Why doesn't everyone care about what I care about as much as I care about it?

Friends, we're going to have to face it – not everyone wants to work with children, not everyone wants to sing in the choir, not everyone has the skills to paint sets for the Christmas play. But when we look around, we see we're not really alone. Each person has to find their place. And we must learn to respect that.

Make no mistake though – we all have a responsibility as Christians. We are all under the same directive – to go forth and make disciples of Jesus Christ. I'm just saying that we won't all be moved to do that by volunteering in the nursery.

So, what did God do after he let Elijah vent? After Elijah said, “I've served you faithfully but now I'm running for my life and the children of Israel have broken their covenant, torn down your altars and killed your prophets and I'm all that's left...” “I'm really, really good and they're really, really bad. Life isn't fair. Nobody loves me, everybody hates me, I think I'll eat a worm....”

God says, “Go out and stand on the mountain before the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.” Oh man. Get ready. Daddy's home and now you're gonna get it. The last time God manifested himself on this mountain Moses' face glowed so much that people were frightened of him.

Now there was a great wind, so strong that it was splitting mountains and breaking rocks in pieces before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a sound of sheer silence.

Note that the Lord was NOT in the wind, He was NOT in the earthquake and He was NOT in the fire. That seems to be the place that people expect to see God. In the big shows. In the shock and awe. People expect God to show himself in the big displays of power and might. And truly his power and might can be witnessed in those displays. But those dramatic manifestations are not the same as personal encounters with God. We often forget the lesson, “Not by might, nor by power, but by my Spirit, says the Lord.”

after the fire a sound of sheer silence. When Elijah heard it, he wrapped his face in his mantle and went out and stood at the entrance of the cave.

Elijah knew. He sensed the presence. He wrapped his face in his mantle and stood at the entrance of the cave. He knew that God was present in the still small voice, the gentle whisper – in a way that He was not in the more dramatic phenomenon. Because of that special presence of God, Elijah humbled himself by covering his face. He was subdued. He was awe-stricken. Full of reverence. Oh, what a wondrous thing. To be humble enough to admit that we are human. Sinners. In need of grace.

And then the voice of God asked again, “What are you doing here, Elijah?”

I'm not sure that after a wind that was breaking rocks or an earthquake or fire...that I would have had the guts to give the same answer as before...but Elijah says again, perhaps more humbly? “I have been very zealous for the Lord, the God of hosts; for the Israelites have forsaken your covenant, thrown down your altars, and killed your prophets with the sword. I alone am left, and they are seeking my life, to take it away.”

There is nothing wrong with his answer. It is an honest answer. “I've been working for you faithfully, I feel all alone and I fear for my life.” I think we all agree that we have felt this way – maybe we don't have the death threat over our heads from Jezebel. Maybe we fear something else for our lives. Maybe we are afraid that our friends won't understand if we are a prophet for the Lord. Maybe we are afraid that our lives will change if we become zealous about our faith. Maybe there is something that we don't want to give up in our lives.

Perhaps we are feeling all alone in our walk. Perhaps we think nobody cares enough about the ministry of the church that we are most passionate about. Maybe we are still laying under the broom tree hoping for an angel to come and give us hope and encouragement.

God's answer to Elijah was not what I expected. If I were Elijah I would have been hoping for a “well done my good and faithful servant, here's your cushy arm chair and an unlimited supply of snacks.” I might have settled for “you poor thing. Why don't you take a vacation and go contemplate the stars and the vastness of the universe?” I sure wouldn't have wanted God's answer to Elijah.

“Go, return on your way to the wilderness of Damascus; when you arrive, you shall anoint Hazael as king over Aram”...and so on, and so on...

A work assignment? Really?

But that is exactly what Elijah needed. Something to do. He needed a task to focus on so he could avoid excessive introspection. He needed to stop looking at himself and his own (admittedly difficult) circumstances. He needed to get on with what God wanted him to do. He sent him off about his Master's business again. I will bet you that when he went back over that road, it was with a different step than what brought him down to Beersheba. He came along terrified and depressed; now he goes back having witnessed majesty. He's not going to be afraid of Jezebel now!

Elijah is like all of us – we can be overwhelmed and burned out. We can feel lost and alone. God provided exactly what Elijah needed. Rest and rejuvenation, time for reflection, a glimpse of his majesty and power – and then the last piece: a kick in the pants.

Get back to work! You're not done yet! He also send him to recruit Elisha, giving him a friend and successor. He informed him that there were 7000 faithful – that Elijah was not alone. That the worship of the true God was still being retained, though Elijah did not know that there was even one beside himself. That the still small voice was still doing for Israel what Elijah could not do alone.

How many of us need to rededicate ourselves to the work of the one true God? Are we feeling Elijah-ish? Maybe we burned out and got stuck in the rest and rejuvenation phase? Still wandering around on the path to Mount Horeb? Or are we sitting in our cave waiting for a big show of God's power? Or have we witnessed God's power and feel unworthy and unsure of what our work assignment is?

Today, start being in prayer about your role in God's church. Be encouraged. God is with us every step of the way. W. Macintosh Mackay wrote in Words of this Life: There are three kinds of Christian workers - canal barges, sailing ships, and Atlantic liners. The canal barges need to be dragged to the work. Often they do wonderfully well, but on the whole one volunteer is better than three pressed into service. The sailing ships make fine going as long as wind and tide are with them, but when things get hard, when 'the winds are contrary,' when the work is discouraging, they turn tail and sail away. But give me the Atlantic-liner type of worker, the person who can fight through wind and tempest, because within there burns the mighty furnace of the love of Christ.

Burn mighty. Fight through the wind and tempest. Spread the love of Jesus Christ.

In the name of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost. Amen.

Planning Ahead

Earlier this week a friend posted some plans on her Facebook timeline:

After attending roughly one funeral per month for the past 15 months, I've decided to share what I want as a send-off. I don't plan on going gentle into any good night, and hopefully not any time soon, but just for the record, here are my wishes:

I would like a Viking funeral. Any body of water will do but I think the lake at Sweet Briar would be poetic. The program for the service should be letterpressed onto an elegant, yet heavy, pearl or ivory stock. Use Mrs Eaves for the font.

Crying is encouraged. Extra points will be awarded to those who flail about and collapse to the ground under the weight of their grief. Door prizes should be awarded for farthest travel, best mascara face, cutest shoes, etc. Instead of a band, I would like the entertainment to be Jeff Sigler performing the Cask of Amontillado. It is one of the most amazing things I have ever seen, and since I'll be watching, I'd like to see it again.

I love flowers, so none of this "donations in lieu of" business. The bigger the arrangement, the more you loved me, I say. Ideally, large boxwood topiaries would be carved into things I would find lovely and/or amusing.

Since I'm not a beer drinker, pouring out some of your 40 in my memory doesn't really fit. I'd like to suggest squeezing out the filling of Krispy Kreme raspberry doughnuts as an alternative.

Speaking of food, someone should make sure the refreshments include Chik-fil-a nuggets, orange tic tacs and my grandmother's cheesecake, as they represent things I loved in live and never once turned down.

Other than that, I'm not picky.

I loved it. Loved all of it. In fact, I love her even a little bit more because now I know I'm not alone in trying to instruct the people left behind how I would like for them to behave. I think it is only proper to leave specific directions. There are a few comments I would make on her choices.

The Viking funeral does not surprise me, nor does the idea that you have chosen a font for your service program...I personally plan to be cremated. In fact, everyone in my family has indicated a preference for cremation. Except my brother who "wants the box" and Dad who wants to donate his body to science. We are not sure what we'll have to pay UVA to take that old thing off our hands - but we'll do our best. We are also considering sticking him in a canoe and pointing him down the James River toward Richmond. It is not certain if we will wait until he expires or if that will be the cause of death. And yes, as my sister Susan pointed out to my friend (and her friends), I do wish to have my ashes put in snack size baggies and distributed at the funeral so that people can sprinkle me wherever they feel closest to me. Maybe that is creepy - I obviously think it is a delightful idea. Even if Susan flushes me.

"Crying is encouraged." Absolutely! And I promised Ms. A that I will win the prize for flailing about on the sanctuary floor until I have to be restrained and/or sedated. I shall weep and gasp for breath and create the most incredible scene. I will quote scripture and sing gospel songs. I will not be wearing cute shoes. Sorry.

Who the heck is Jeff Sigler and what, pray tell, is the Cask of Amontillado? I shall go forth and Google it: OH! Poe!! I do love a good Edgar Allen Poe tale. I should have some recollection of that...but I admit I do not. It is more likely at my funeral that there will be a DVD of Jeff Dunham and clips of Achmed the Dead Terrorist. Clearly not as highbrow as Ms. A...but still amusing. And still a guy named Jeff.

That brings us to flowers. I'm with her, I like flowers. Well, most flowers. When I first wrote down my "to be opened upon the event of my death" directions I actually instructed my Dad to remove any of those fluffy mums and any lillies. Both of which creep me the hell out. I'm also okay if people make donations in lieu of flowers - make it something good though!! Or creative! So...something between a donation to the Red Cross or a small non-profit that helps people removed neck tattoos of dragons.

Who pours beer out? That doesn't honor me! My family knows that my biggest wish is for one kick ass wake. I want even the preacher to call for a cab home. You should weep and drink and eat and mourn and drink and laugh. Read passages of The Beaten Hamster like they were poems of Lord Byron. Perform the dream about lime green alligators as though Shakespeare wrote it. Party like it's 1999. And if you're going to squeeze any doughnuts - I prefer lemon.

Respect for the CFA Hate Nuggets (I do visit Chickfila sometimes, but then I make a donation to the Human Rights Campaign) and the orange TicTacs. Had a dream once that I was at K-mart trying to return a box of orange TicTacs. Not a very helpful help desk in that dream.

Like Ms. A - I'm not planning on departing any time soon. But I also don't shy away from letting people know what I want after I'm gone. #1 - give every useful part to someone who can use it. Skin, corneas, heart, liver, whatever. Organ donors rock. I fully believe that in heaven it will be like the DisneyWorld Fastpass...Organ Donors get to go everywhere first. Don't forget to tell your family!!

I'm in the Mob!

Although I had heard about this mob a time or two before - today was my first time being IN the mob. No, we didn't send anyone to sleep with the fishes...but we did get to eat some really good fishes!

This morning I got a text from my sister Denise (she has been in the mob several times) letting me know that the Lynchburg Cash Mob was meeting at 10:30am to mob a store in Madison Heights. Before you get worried, it's a good thing. Sounds like we're storming in to paint graffiti on the walls. A cash mob gets together to support a local merchant. Which I think is a very good thing. And as a bonus, we then headed to a local restaurant (no chains!) for lunch!

The store that was being mobbed this morning was Anderson's Country Market, 3748 S. Amherst Highway in Madison Heights. I had been to Anderson's when it was in a different location, but I hadn't gotten around to visiting their new home. Wow, what an incredible difference! It is a fantastic shop. I could try to list all of the different things they offer, but I will certainly leave something important out. They have beautiful plants outside, but since I have no skills to keep beautiful plants alive...I went inside right away. They offer local baked goods, a great deli (today's free cheese sample was swiss with rye...rye INSIDE the cheese! It rocked.), a whole aisle of jellies/jams/preserves including something called Hoppin' Frog Jam. I have been assured that it contains no frog. It is a bunch of fruits and some jalapeno!

There was this section of cream cheeses and soft cheeses that I stopped and stared at for a very long time. I ended up getting Raspberry Walnut Cream Cheese and some Pineapple Cream Cheese and some pretzel sticks to eat them on. A large chunk of excellent cheddar cheese also followed me home.

There are aisles of things like flax seed and special flours and spices and stuff...but I skipped past there and headed to the most awesome aisle of all...the candy aisle!!!!! Many, many (many, many...) years ago my family traveled a good bit through the back roads of Virginia, North Carolina, Tennessee and Georgia. Our favorite stops were the "country stores" (read: tourist traps) where my brother could find Mexican Jumping Beans and my little sister would beg for the "real Indian doll dressed in authentic leather." My older sisters moved past the collectible spoons and Denise would opt for the Pecan Log (which would end up being found at the end of the trip partially eaten and covered with ants). My favorite thing was the candy sticks. There would be about 40 different flavors including fruits I had never heard of (gooseberry?). I think they were 2 for .25 at that time (did I mention this was many, many years ago?) and I would struggle with picking only 2! I usually picked orange or lemon as one...but then felt a compelling desire to get something "different." I remember how excited I was that Horehound was a choice because I had just read about that in a Little House on the Prairie book. That was nasty. It joined the Pecan Log under the van seat and I don't think the ants even liked it. Well - Anderson's Country Store has candy sticks!! And a hundred other choices.


Today I got Lemon Drops and Mini Pareils (little minty candies with tiny candy pebbles on the bottom - like the picture to the right except the candy is pastel and pebbles are white. So, nothing like the picture to the right...). And I got my sister Karen some dehydrated marshmallows - like Lucky Charms without the pesky cereal. A loaf of Sourdough Bread, jar of picked eggs and a couple other bags of snacks rounded out my purchases. Although the guideline for a cash mob participant is to spend 10-20 bucks - I finally stopped at about $45. Denise and I agree that THIS is where we're doing all our Christmas shopping this year. I already know what I'm putting on my list!!

I think there were about 20 mobbers that gathered today. And I think that the store owners were happy to have us there. I'm glad that I finally had the push that I needed to visit the new location - it is bright and clean and the staff is wonderfully friendly and helpful. Even if you weren't there today - I hope you'll stop in soon. If you're heading north on 29 (from Lynchburg) it will be on your left. Turn left at the light at Dixie Airport Road (yep, get in the left turn lane...it is a tiny bit confusing at first).

After shopping part of the group joined together for an "after social" lunch at Merredith's on Dixie Airport Road. We all had their fantastic Saturday lunch buffet (they have it on Sunday too!). I ate baked chicken, fried chicken, fried whiting, macaroni and cheese, cabbage, corn and a wonderful yeast roll. For dessert I had orange pineapple coconut cake. Although the cake was a little sweet for my taste, the food was some of the best soul food I've ever had. And my family had a chance to visit with the organizer of the cash mob, Victor Gosnell, and his family.

I'm not a person who usually gets up and DOES stuff on Saturday morning - but this was definitely a great way to start off the holiday weekend. I'm looking forward to next month when the mob gets together again!

See See How They Run!

Yep, not a typo - I want to be sure that you go see See How They Run at the Renaissance Theatre in Lynchburg! I saw it on Saturday evening and had a rollicking good time!

You know how you go see some shows or movies and they are "chuckling" funny. You see the jokes coming from miles away and although you chuckle and smile...you don't get those crazy uncontrolled outbursts of laughter. I was hoping for laughter like when my Dad watches the boat scene from Weekend at Bernie's. You know, when Bernie falls out of the boat and keeps hitting the buoys? And although the guys hear the bells ring when he hits one - he must hit a half dozen or more before they haul his dead body back onto the boat. When Dad watches that scene he laughs until he cries. The first time we saw it I think he laughed until he couldn't breathe properly.

THAT is the kind of laughter that I was craving. Recently I have seen amusing movies (like Identity Thief) and cute shows (like Suessical the Musical) but nothing like the entertaining farce See How They Run.

Not the Renaissance production,
but you get the idea!!

I don't want to give too much of the plot away...the play is set in an English vicarage (that's the place where a vicar lives) and the key players are the vicar, his flamboyant wife, their cockney maid and a very stuffy old biddy from the parish. To tell you much more about the cast, I might give away the plot points that lead to a parade of vicars running through the vicarage (one of them in his underclothes!).

I was not familiar with most of the cast - but I was so excited to see my good friend Shelbie Filson playing the role of "old biddy" Miss Skillon. Shelbie is always talented, but this was a riot. Her facial expressions from the beginning of the show when she is sternly disapproving of "that woman" decorating the pulpit (which she has ALWAYS done!) until the very end of the show when ... oh, that's right. No spoilers. But watch that woman...she cracks me up.

The great thing about seeing a show at the Renaissance is that the setting is very intimate. The theatre seats about 100 people and I enjoyed a front row seat. At times I could have reached out and touched one of the performers. I understand they frown on that...so I didn't. But I could hear every word of dialogue perfectly and felt like the show was unfolding just for me. It is a great experience.

I think I'm going to one more show this week (trying to, anyway) - E.C. Glass is staging Picasso at the Lapin Agile in the Alumni Theatre. Small theatre, so tickets will go quickly. It's a cool show where Einstein meets Picasso in a bar and they drink absinthe. If memory serves, Elvis shows up too. Or that could be the absinthe talking.



Get out and see live theatre - with three colleges, two high schools and a couple regional theatres - opportunities abound!

Background became Foreground

I realized something tonight...and understood why my brother-in-law painted our living room alone instead of having us help him. It is physically painful to watch people do something you do well...when they do it so badly.

I worked as a professional theatre technician for 3 years. As a highly respected volunteer in the field for about 20 years. As a sound tech and sound consultant for about 15 years. When theatre tech is done right, the audience doesn't even know you exist. It is an exquisite dance between the performers and the support team but only one half is visible.

Techs are an interesting breed. We wear black. We arrive early and leave late. We drink our coffee black because we don't have time to chase down cream and sugar. We get the thrill from the applause and stand in the shadows knowing that part of that is ours. Acknowledgment is appreciated but we get our satisfaction from a different place. It is the smooth execution of the invisible plan that draws us back to the next performance and the next production.

When Patrick sees the poorly executed paint job...it pains him. When I see a production where the performers pour their heart into their roles and it is overwhelmed by technical errors - I feel physically ill. 

To the performers I saw tonight - you did a good job. Some of you were incredible and some were adequate. Some I can't tell because I couldn't hear you, see you, or was distracted by weird backstage flaws. To my brother-in-law...I understand a bit better.

Hamster beaten...but not flown.

Question #1

Yep...my usual crutch of Random Questions to spark creative thoughts. I hope you'll excuse me, was really sick last week and the incoming weather is giving me a headache. 1st question!

Would you rather go without junk food for a year or TV for year? Oh man...could that have been a week? I think I could go without either for a week (but not both, let's not get crazy) but a year is taking an enormous amount of consideration. I think that if I had to choose - I would have to give up the junk food. No! TV. NO! Junk food....wait, can we define junk food? Okay...I'd give up the TV. And watch shows on my computer. No? Is that cheating? I know this shouldn't be that hard. Maybe I've discovered what I need to consider for Lent next year! If I define junk food as candy bars and chips, I'd give those up. But if it includes all desserts and stuff like popcorn at the movies...got to give up the TV. So, I'll go with giving up TV. And that's my final answer. (of what I would rather give up...but I'm not doing either one).

Here's hoping for an easier question #2 (fingers crossed)

What is your favorite holiday? wait...haven't I answered that one before? (hang on, going to look) Apparently I have not...Well, I wandered back through posts till I got to sometime late last summer, and didn't find it. The question on the table, therefore, is: what is your favorite holiday? I'd like to come up with some smart ass answer like "Arbor Day" or "National Pickle Day" - and I'd like to avoid the really obvious ones like Christmas and Easter. Favorite...does my birthday count? Assuming that my birthday does NOT count as a favorite holiday then I will have to go with Memorial Day because it marks the beginning of summer. I love spending time at the Riva Howse and especially spending time IN the river - so Memorial Day is the beginning of that season. During Memorial Day weekend the family gets together and has classic picnic-type gatherings, although the food is often non-traditional. Last year we had Cuban sandwiches. I'm hoping for a repeat this year!

Last question for the night (you can follow all those little blue links and read old stuff...)

What is your morning routine? I wake up roughly 30 minutes before I have to leave the house. I put in my contacts and stare at an old episode of Charmed, Boy Meets World, Friends, and Fresh Prince (yes, all of the above...I get bored easily). I put on clothes in exactly the same order every morning. I go upstairs, put on shoes and go to work. It is not so much a routine as a habit. I guess if I gave up TV... the routine would change. Stupid question.

That deserves one more question, but I won't promise to answer it....

What was the last movie you saw? hmmm...oh right...Admission with Tina Fey and Paul Rudd. Eh...it was alright. Lily Tomlin was good. Before that we saw Oz the Great and Powerful - which I thought was great! Saw it in 3D and for the first time in a long time there were effects that I thought were worth wearing the stupid glasses (meaning stuff flew at me). I understand the whole concept of depth of field and crisper visuals - but the glasses usually give me a headache and I think that if I have to get the headache I should at least have stuff flying at me. The snowy poppy field scene rocked.

Hamster not totally beaten, but gently pummeled.

Post #246

Pleasant Cat

Doesn't someone need a nice little cat? I thought we had a home for Avocado...but that fell through. And my "kids" are just not going to get along. I guess I had this vision of the two of them holding paws and singing KumBaYah after a getting to know each other. Just ain't gonna happen. My forever cat - Rude Cat/Toey/Chloe just loves me so much that she wants me all to herself. Completely understandable - I am pretty wonderful. But all this adoration (in the form of hissing, growling and stalking) is getting old. So I continue to seek a forever home for 'Cado. She is a nice little cat - loving, energetic, curious, and very patient. She continues to ignore the inhospitable conditions of her foster home - but I think she'd like a family to call her very own. If you're interested just go to the Angels of Assisi website for the cat adoption application. I'll even split the adoption fee with you!

Rude Cat

Enough of cats... In fact, here is a list of things I don't want to discuss today: sequestration, limbs falling on neighbor's carports, taxes, software installation, meat (gave it up for Lent....), weather, regulations or project development. Soooooooooo......something positive......or interesting......or random.......


Ah! Random!! To the Random Questionizer!!

Forsythia - please don't shape into balls...that makes me sad

What is your favorite season?
Oh, what a good question RQ! Usually it is the season that I'm anticipating. Right now my favorite season is Spring (the groundhog got it all messed up this year) because it is just around the corner. I love the fact that we've had jonquils (daffodils) blooming - even though they spent some time covered with snow. I look forward to the forsythia and the dogwood and the redbud bursting into bloom. Virginia has some of the best flowering trees. But in a few weeks I will probably hate Spring because my sinuses will be all irritated from the dang flowering trees. Then I will be looking forward to my favorite season, Summer! Getting to go swimming in the river with my family, eating picnics at the Riva Howse, the feeling of grass between my toes. But after a few weeks I will hate Summer...too hot, too many kids, too many bugs and too much grass to cut. Then I will be looking forward to my favorite season, Fall! Cool crisp days, evenings by the river curled up by a fire.... Well, you get the idea. My favorite season is the next one!

As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up? I'm not grown up now!! As a child I can remember wanting to be a teacher, botanist, mechanic, gymnast, baker...I even opened up my very own Flip Flop Repair Shop (to fix broken flip flops) but it failed for lack of customers. I was more successful running a backyard carnival to raise money for MDA. The carnival was about as well thought out as the FFRS - but I had a few more customers. My best friend Amber and I ran the whole thing - when she and I were counting the money her Dad kept putting in random bits of change that would make the total uneven. So her mother (who apparently liked even numbers) would add enough to round the total back up to an even dollar amount. Then her Dad would add in another little bit...I think we got an extra 15 or 20 bucks from their rivalry! Did I ever think that I would do the jobs that I have done so far? Nope.

Last question: Do you prefer to shop online or in a store? This one would make my sisters laugh! I prefer not to shop at all. In fact, I generally send one of them to buy clothes for me. I hate to shop. There are only two kinds of stores that I actually like to shop in: grocery stores (especially the specialty food areas) and hardware stores. I get practically giddy when I go into a hardware store. I love to look at all the different plumbing supplies and tools and stuff. I even love that smell - a combination of wood, paints, spirits, fertilizer and that something intangible that ties it all together. So - my favorite place within driving distance? Carson's Hardware in Concord, VA. It is a hardware store and a grocery store together! With a deli that has Boar's Head meats.

Wait...I said I wasn't talking about meat! Dang...now I want a sandwich...Easter can't get here soon enough!